Carla
by menstrual_sweatpants_disco on Mar.29, 2009, under HollaDaddy
Identity used for this conversation:
“HollaDaddy”
Victim’s name:
carla
Photo:
Message she sent me:
Thanks for the add ;)
My response:
aint no thang, sexxi. wuts good witchu?
Her:
Nuttin much, at work right now.
Me:
me too gurl. so wut u do for werk? why dont u have a man providing for ur butiful self? I’d neva make u werk, gurl
Her:
Lol well thanks it’s hard to find a man like that, I’m a secretary for PSL. What do you do?
Me:
Oh nice gurl. dat sounds good. Is it interesting at least?
I werk in a grapesoda bottling plant. I’m in da office part of it tho. gets me paaaaaaid on teh real 100
Her:
Lol, actually no it’s really boring I dnt ever have anything to do so I’m on myspace or watchin tv all day, lol but I do get paid good for it.
Me:
dam. that sound pretty good, gurl. so wut u lyke 2 do for fun? u madd sexxi
Her:
Aww thanks ;) umm I like the movies, bowling, playin pool, the beach, party every now and then but I work so much I gota watch that, lol, and just chillin, you?
Me:
jus about tha same gurl. chillin wit friends, goin 2 movies an tawkin real loud, i also lyke playin pool, hittin da clubs is fun now and den too. as long as its in moderashun
Her:
Yea thats how I am.
Me:
we should go shoot sum pool sumtime u an me. u sound lyke fun.
Her:
Do you live here in orlando?
Me:
I actually just movedd out 2 edgewood about 2 weeks ago. iv been in compton most mah life but jus movved 2 FL wit a friend. still gettin used 2 it.
Her:
Lol, I could do that.
Me:
We should get some drinks afterwards, too.
Her:
I’m down for that.
Me:
Then maybe I’ll get you naked and slap you around a little.
Her:
Ha ha not likely.
Me:
ok ok I’ll leave the slappin part out. The naked part sounds good though. u’s a beautiful thang.
Her:
Thanks for the compliment but I’m not that easy.
Me:
With that kind of backtalk, you’re going to get a mighty good slapping.
I can’t wait to get you naked and give my fists a workout.
Her:
lol, like I said, with that kinda talk I hope you can wait cuz you’ll b doin alot of it.
Me:
I’m sorry. We got off on the wrong foot. My name’s Fred. How are you doing?
Her:
Lol, much better, I’m carla and I’m aight, you?
Me:
I’m doing well. May I see a photo of your vagina, carla?
Her:
Wow you need to stop writing me.
Me:
I guess nice guys always finish last :(
Her:
Yea if you call that nice I’d hate to c your bad guys.
Me:
So where should we go to shoot pool?
Her:
R you serious?
Me:
What? I thought you liked pool.
Her:
Yea I like pool but so far I’m not liking you.
Me:
You barely know me. I don’t even punch that hard, really. Give a brutha a chance.
Her:
Yea but you cummin off all wrong, i’m a lady nota hoe.
Me:
I’m really sorry. That is absolutely not my intention at all. I’m not very good at this and we really got off on the wrong foot. I want to stat over again. My name’s Fred. How are doing today?
Her:
Ok I’m guna try this 1 more time but you say any more slick shit I aint writing back.
Me:
OK. I’m sorry. So how are you? How’s work been treating you so far today? Hopefully still nice and not-busy. Busy days at work are always no good. Believe me, I know.
Her:
Yea work is still good, I dnt ever get busy.
Me:
Well that’s good. So I understand you might not have a camera, which is why you’re not so willing to send me the vagina photos. If I were to purchase and send you a nice quality camera would you then be willing to dress up like Hitler and eat lipstick while snapping some photos of your cunt for me?
Her:
Lol, wow get on sumwhere.
Me:
Is that a yes? Just give me your address and I’ll buy the camera right now.
Her:
Bye!!!
Me:
I want you to take my hand in marriage.
Her:
Wow what the hell is wrong with you?
Me:
I huff 2 cans of patch a flat a day. How fat are your fingers so I can buy you a ring, toots?
Her:
Lol, wow your sumthin else.
Me:
I’m just going to assume you’re retardedly fat if you don’t give me a straight answer. I don’t have time for games. You’re toying with my heart and I don’t appreciate it.
Her:
Oooooook bye now!
Me:
So what are you wearing?
Her:
Stop writing me, I’m sure theres plenty of myspace freaks out there who would love to chat with you but not me.
Me:
But they’re not the same as you. You’re special. You’re like the ugly duckling that turned into the girl who I punched in the face until I reached orgasm.
Her:
Wow your a loser!!
Me:
Whisper sweet nothings into my ear, my beautiful punching bag.
March 29th, 2009 on 10:10 pm
Work in a grape soda factory haha. Easily one of the best sites!
March 30th, 2009 on 2:30 am
“I werk in a grapesoda bottling plant” hhahaha another good one.
Wow she really doesn’t have anything to do. Not long before she’s fired.
March 30th, 2009 on 5:16 am
I know. I’d be scared to have a job like hers. Doing nothing all day is great as long as the company doesn’t realize there’s not enough work to justify keeping your position filled.
April 3rd, 2009 on 4:42 pm
“With that kind of backtalk, you’re going to get a mighty good slapping.
I can’t wait to get you naked and give my fists a workout.”
Oh, Jesus, I nearly pissed myself.
April 9th, 2009 on 2:24 am
Holy Shit. I just found your site – I’ve been doing this for years with people seeing how fucked up everyone really is. Love the site man. You kill it.
April 9th, 2009 on 10:29 pm
Are dese yo ducks????
April 10th, 2009 on 7:01 pm
You’re like the ugly duckling that turned into the girl who I punched in the face until I reached orgasm.
April 17th, 2009 on 9:07 am
One of your best!
April 24th, 2009 on 4:54 pm
Best line in the history of the Internet:
“But they’re not the same as you. You’re special. You’re like the ugly duckling that turned into the girl who I punched in the face until I reached orgasm.”
July 26th, 2009 on 1:57 pm
Im secretly in love with you lmaooo.
September 1st, 2009 on 3:32 pm
“You’re special. You’re like the ugly duckling that turned into the girl who I punched in the face until I reached orgasm.” Epicz.